4 Strategies for Combating Holiday Overwhelm
The holidays are marketed as the “most wonderful time of the year” For me, they often feel like the most overwhelming time of the year. I have learned that if I do not schedule some time for recovery and self-care, it does not go well. Recovery is defined as “a return to a normal or healthy condition” or your body’s ability to restore its physical and mental processes. Non-stop activity- be it physical exercise or holiday entertaining and celebrating – can throw your body into overwhelm, undermining your energy, along with your health. The goal of recovery is to refresh and restore your mind and body, so you can meet and exceed your previous performance. Recovery Strategies Some of my favorite strategies for self-care and recovery include grounding, self-care and nourishing, sleep, boundaries and 1. Grounding Grounding is a technique that helps you connect to the healing energy of nature and the Earth. Grounding brings us into a state of balance, both mentally and physically. It is in this balanced state that our body can rest, repair, and heal on the physical, emotional, and spiritual levels. When we physically ground and connect to Earth – or apply essential oils derived from plants grown on the Earth – we connect to the balance of nature. Essential oils and the energy of nature, especially oils from grounded plants like trees or grasses, help ground us and return our bodies to the state of balance and enhance our ability to change in response to the body’s demands. Essential oils, especially those derived from grounded plants like trees which are intrinsically grounded through their root structure into the Earth. Essential oils comprised of barks, roots, grasses, needles, and resin of plants also help you pull your energy centers down into the Earth. Plants that grow under the earth are entrenched with the earth’s energies. This is why stones, root vegetables, or essential oils from root plants that share space with the Earth, match the frequency of the Earth and can be used for grounding. This helps to naturally reduce inflammation, optimize organ function and improve detoxification, by allowing toxins to flow out of us and into the Earth. On the emotional level, grounding allows your thoughts and emotions to move through us more easily. On a spiritual level, grounding enhances your connection to your intuition and spiritual guidance. When we connect to nature by consuming a plant-based diet, applying essential oils derived from plants, hiking in the woods, walking barefoot on the grass or dirt, we allow our bodies to align with the natural rhythm of the planet. When we lose this connection to nature, it interferes with our internal rhythm and balance, impeding our ability to return to balance so we can relax, sleep, detoxify, digest, repair, and heal. When we ground ourselves, these natural processes flow easily without interference. My favorite essential oils for grounding are vetiver (Chrysopogon zizanioides), mandrake (Mandragora officinarum), and patchouli (Pogostemon cablin). Vetiver, a perennial bunchgrass with very deep roots that help ground it to the Earth. Vetiver essential oil is extracted from these deep roots and is known to amplify your connection with the earth helping to ground and center you mentally, physically, and emotionally, often helping you explore the root of your emotional issues. The fibers of this relative of lemongrass are often woven into sleeping mats that release their cooling scent when slept on. Vetiver is used extensively by our perfume masters at Alpha Aromatics, who have been both pioneers and leaders in the industry since the 1940s. It is an excellent fixative in potpourris and related items because the essential oil improves with age. Vetiver’s deep, smoky and woody aroma has long been associated with colognes, and it is the main ingredient in most modern fragrances, after-shaves, and other scented products for men. Mandrake is a perennial plant that grows wild in areas influenced by the Mediterranean climate. The plant has large leaves and a very short stem, and it bears purple flowers that turn to yellowish fruits. Mandrake root has anesthetic, aphrodisiac, cathartic, cholagogue, emetic, hypnotic, mydriatic, narcotic, nevrine, poison, purgative, refrigerant, sedative, and stimulant properties. Fresh roots were once used to treat chronic pains, convulsions, rheumatic pains, and scrofulous tumors. Pounded leaves and boiled roots were used for the treatment of tumors. Roots boiled in milk were used to treat slow-healing wounds. Roots soaked in brandy were used for chronic rheumatism. Mandrake has also been used for asthma, colic, coughs, hay fever, hepatitis, schizophrenia, and sclerosis. Patchouli grounds and calms, while at the same time uplifts. It is earthy and warming and great for the overthinker or worrying types, those a bit too in the head and out of touch with their body. An oil that some might call an acquired taste, Patchouli Essential Oil has a deep aroma that is woody, rich and earthy, and somewhat similar to wine. As a member of the mint family, the most commonly used portions of the plant are the dried leaves and the essential oils, but some practitioners use the stems as well. Patchouli helps us get back in touch with who we are at our core. Stripping away constructs that we may have formed around us. Patchouli is about giving more space to who we really are. To be the light in our heart, to be the essence of who we are at heart. 2. Self Care and Nourishing Self-care has been defined as the process of taking care of yourself with behaviors that promote health and relaxation. This can include healthy food choices, restful sleep, gratitude, and forgiveness practices. There will always be triggers that throw you off balance. Some of these triggers are within your control (like what you eat or where you focus your attention) and some you cannot (like other people and their choices). Keeping your emotions on an even keel goes a long way toward maintaining composure and equilibrium. You’re less likely to get bent out of shape if you maintain
Join My 7 day Gratitude Challenge That Can Change Your Life
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend” – Buddha Gratitude is not a feeling that we give a lot of importance to. We experience it occasionally but it’s not something we really stop and reflect upon. Perhaps that’s why so many people today are so discontented and dissatisfied with their jobs, their relationships, and their lives. In today’s consumer-driven and the super-competitive world, our more prevalent emotions tend to be anger, frustration, envy and often, despair. Even people with wealth and successful careers feel this way. Why do we feel that something is missing in our lives? The likely answer is that we lack gratitude. Gratitude is one of the most overlooked factors in our pursuit of self-improvement and personal well-being. Although not an external skill that can be learned, gratitude is an innate quality, a potential mindset that exists in each and every one of us. It can be awakened and developed to dramatically change your outlook – and transform your life in ways you never imagined. Practicing gratitude creates a huge paradigm shift. Suddenly, so many of the things that keep you tossing and turning at night become trivial and meaningless – while the things you should be putting your effort into, the things that have true value and meaning, become crystal-clear. No physical skill can ever transform your life in this way. This is not a bogus theory. A wealth of research has proven that the regular practice of gratitude helps achieve lasting happiness and success. So, how do we “practice” something as elusive and intangible as gratitude? Actually, it’s one of the easiest things to do. This 7-Day Challenge will show you how to practice a different form of gratitude every day for one week. It will help rewire your brain and sow the seeds for a lasting mindset that becomes second nature. Try it yourself and at the end of the seven days you will never view your life – and the world around you – in the same way again! What Science Tells Us About Gratitude Gratitude is one of the most researched concepts in psychology and behavioral science. Not only has it been proven to improve happiness and strengthen social and personal relationships, but it has also been proven to boost success and productivity, as well as promote overall physical and mental health. Here are some surprising facts that science can tell us: 1. Most people don’t express gratitude at their workplace. 2. Women are more grateful than men. 3. Grateful people exercise more and are more health-conscious. 4. Gratitude improves sleep. 5. Gratitude lowers cholesterol levels. 6. Grateful people are more likely to achieve their goals. 7. Gratitude strengthens personal relationships. 8. Gratitude alleviates depression. 9. Gratitude helps people make wiser buying decisions and not overspend. 10. Gratitude strengthens inner peace. With all these proven benefits, it’s no wonder that many wellness experts are recommending that their clients practice gratitude regularly. In addition, many psychiatrists are now incorporating gratitude practices and exercises into their therapies. The bottom line: Gratitude is likely one of the few things in life that has no downsides. Scientifically, there can be no doubt that gratitude is good for us on many levels! Getting Started The 7-Day Gratitude Challenge requires no special preparations or costs. All you need to get started are two key things: Keep A Gratitude Journal The challenge needs to go hand in hand with a gratitude journal where you record your experiences at the end of each day. Ideally, you should keep a physical journal where you record entries in handwriting as this will better imprint the experiences in your mind. Each night before you go to bed, take a few minutes to jot down how that day’s challenge went, any particular things you noticed and how you feel. You must do this each day for the first seven days and the next seven days if you decided to repeat the challenge for another week. As you get the hang of it, it’s sufficient to make entries into your journal twice or three times a week after that. There’s an added bonus as well. Research has linked gratitude journaling with lower stress levels, improved mental clarity, and better sleep. This should be enough motivation to keep your journal entries top of mind at the end of each day! Consistency Is Key. When you make the intention to take the 7-Day Challenge, you must make the commitment to follow through consistently. The first week is especially important because you are preparing your brain to rewire itself for gratitude. If you skip days or go through the challenges half-heartedly, your brain will register that gratitude is not important enough for you to make it a habit. However, this may not be easy for everyone. Perhaps the one downside to practicing gratitude is that it won’t be easy for people who are generally pessimistic and negative in their thinking. We are all programmed to think negatively more than we do positively, as it is an innate survival instinct from the days when our ancestors had to expect the worst in order to stay alive. However, this can definitely be overcome with consistency and practice, The bottom line: In order to change, the brain needs to experience gratitude regularly. That’s why it’s important to follow the challenge through the full seven days and keep gratitude top of mind. Gratitude builds on itself. The more we experience gratitude, the more the brain changes to make it a mindset. Keeping a gratitude journal and staying consistent will allow you to achieve this by creating a continuous cycle of gratitude in your life. Sign up for our Newsletter to receive the 7-day Gratitude Challenge. [email-subscribers-form id=”2″]Please enable JavaScript Email Marketing by Benchmark I
5 Benefits of Keeping a Gratitude Journal
Starting and maintaining a gratitude journal can be challenging because it is just something else you have to remember to do every day. However, after a while, the effort you put into showing your gratitude every day will be well worth it in the long run. Continue to push yourself to do it every night until it becomes a habit. The best time to start a gratitude journal is now. Here are three incredible benefits that you can gain when you begin to keep a gratitude journal. It Increases Positivity When you write things down that you are grateful for in your life, you will naturally become more optimistic and confident. Focusing on the good in your life provides less power to the negative emotions and greater strength for the positive ones. Although you may have positive thoughts come to mind throughout the day, taking the time to write them down makes them more concrete. It Improves Sleep Spending just a few minutes right before you go to bed to write down the things you are grateful for will help quiet your mind and ease any anxieties that you might have about the day. A calm and grateful mind will allow you to fall asleep quicker. Gratitude has been shown to induce the relaxation response and to be a potent sleep aid. Improves Self-Esteem When you focus on the negative things in your life, it can become straightforward to feel down. We tend to be more demanding of ourselves than others, but keeping a gratitude journal can help you stay focused on your achievements. Showing gratitude can help reduce the natural tendencies we have to compare ourselves to those around us, which can be detrimental to our self-esteem. When you show gratitude for what you have, you will harbor less resentment and jealousy toward others and have a more incredible feeling of self-worth. Reduces Stress Researchers have found that it will naturally counteract stress when you focus on feelings of satisfaction and contentment. While you will still have to deal with challenges in your life, having an attitude of gratitude will help you better deal with those challenges. Better Health Grateful people tend to live healthier lives and live longer than their ungrateful counterparts. Grateful people usually have the motivation to take better care of themselves. Grateful people experience fewer aches and pains and are more inclined to eat healthily and exercise. These are only a few of the many benefits of keeping a gratitude journal. If you aren’t already keeping one, starting today will help you live a happier and healthier life. I have created a free printable it has a daily gratitude entry area, doodle, daily affirmations, and how could I have made today a better section. There are two entities on each page. Download it today. [download_after_email id=”874″] Preview: Manifest in the Midwest
Gratitude Journal: A Tool To Help You Live Well
It is still winter in Iowa. The days are short. The nights are long. We tend to spend more time indoors and our pace slows after the holidays. It is a natural cycle that gives us meaningful clues for personal reflection and regeneration. Among many ancient cultures, winter was a time of “looking within,” a time of soul searching and connecting with our inner wisdom. The external darkness beckons us to find our inner light….the spark of the Divine within us all. It is a perfect time to get back to meditation and reflection upon our Divine Purpose. A powerful tool I recommend for spiritual growth is the Gratitude Journal. Take 5 minutes at the end of each day to reflect on your experiences and write at least 5 things you are grateful for, specific to that day. It can be as simple as time for a relaxing cup of tea, a call from a good friend, a beautiful sunrise, or a parking space close to the grocery store on a snowy day! This exercise does two important things: It makes you more mindful & appreciative of blessings and everyday miracles AND it literally magnetizes your energy field to attract more good into your life. Start your Gratitude Journal tonight and you will be amazed at the life you create! What is gratitude? “Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions.” – Zig Ziglar In simple terms, gratitude is the practice of being consciously thankful for the things in your life. It’s the emotion you feel when you acknowledge and appreciate the people you love, the things you have, and the person you are. What’s more, it’s an emotion that you can evoke anytime you choose – because you get to decide what you will and won’t feel gratitude towards. How does gratitude create success and happiness? “When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.” —Willie Nelson Gratitude makes you feel better Take a moment right now to acknowledge something in your life that you’re grateful for. You could choose to focus on your health, your family, or your security. What’s equally valid is focusing on the little things – such as the feel of a hot cup of tea on a cold day, the sun glinting through the clouds, or the book you’re reading that’s igniting something inside of you. As you allow yourself to feel grateful, notice how you feel – then allow yourself to intensify and elevate those good feelings until they wash all over you. This simple experiment is proof that gratitude can transform the way you feel – almost instantly. Through the practice of gratitude, you can switch on feelings of happiness, contentment, peace, satisfaction, and abundance at will. You are in control. Because there’s ALWAYS something to be grateful for [regardless of what’s happening in your life], gratitude is a tool you can lean on to elevate your emotions anytime you want to feel differently. In this way, gratitude can change your experience of life. Your experience of life is related to your perspective. You get to choose whether you see the upside or the downside in the situations and circumstances that come your way. In other words, happiness is always within your grasp because through gratitude; you get to feel more of the emotions that make you feel good. The reason gratitude works is because this practice releases the neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin – two vital feel-good chemicals. In turn, gratitude can help you better navigate stress and anxiety. Gratitude improves your relationships We all lead busy lives, and in the hustle and bustle of everyday living, it is easy to take the people you love the most for granted. We don’t mean too; it’s just that other things grab our attention and create distractions and points of focus. Gratitude in our relationships creates space inside which you can pause and reflect on the things you love and appreciate about others. Again, the small things matter as much as the big things. For example, when was the last time you sent an “I appreciate you” text to your partner, your children, a friend or a family member? What would happen if you told your partner how grateful you are for them taking care of the tasks you hate? Gratitude brings us closer to the people we love because, through gratitude, we demonstrate our love. In this way, gratitude ignites a spiral of increasing connection. Appreciation makes people feel more seen, heard, and valued. It builds trust and respect. In turn, they feel more inspired to show up fully in the relationship. This strengthens your connection, which deepens your love. Consistent appreciation is one way to make your relationship stronger the longer you are together. Healthy relationships create a robust foundation for you to explore and discover the next version of your best self. When you feel seen, loved, and supported by the people closest to you, it’s easier to step up and take risks. It’s easier to dream bigger, and in turn, your success and happiness build. Gratitude inspires confident action You can’t achieve your goals unless you take action, and some of your biggest goals will require you to take a risk and do things you’ve never done before. You have to encourage yourself to put courage over comfort and put yourself out there – even if you’re feeling nauseous and your heart’s pumping like a drum! Gratitude is a powerful foundation to take action upon. That’s because gratitude elevates feelings of optimism and abundance, making it easier for you to do the things that feel scary. How to practice gratitude “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” —Albert Einstein Make gratitude non-negotiable. If you want to leverage the full life-changing benefits of gratitude, you need to practice every day. Build a habit and make gratitude a part of your identity. The easiest way to achieve
The Velveteen Rabbit
“By the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real, you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” (Williams, 2005, p. 17). Today was a day, not a great day, not a horrible day, but a rough day. This morning when grabbing Seraphina from her room, it was a wreck like normal. (She is two and has a toddler bed; she is able to come to my room and her older brother’s room when she gets up. For the most part, she ends up playing with her toys.) This morning she grabbed all her books from her bookshelf. She took her copy of The Velveteen Rabbit and ripped the jacket to shreds. My first reaction was anger. I grabbed the pieces showing them to her, “You can’t rip up your books, you hurt your books!” I was annoyed; this was an unnecessary mess, this will cost me money to get a new book, and I was sad just because I love books. My son popped his head in right mid-tirade and Seraphina started crying and ran to his leg. Oh great now I am a monster too. He laughs and shakes his head and starts picking toys up off the floor. When I get to the books and start placing them back on the shelf I find The Velveteen Rabbit. She only got the book jacket, not the book. Whoo.. Now the guilt rolls in. I bring the book with me downstairs. After breakfast, I put Seraphina on my lap and read her The Velveteen Rabbit. The classic children’s book The Velveteen Rabbit follows the life of a stuffed bunny, made of inexpensive fabric and filled with sawdust. The bunny arrives in a well-to-do little boy’s nursery. Alongside more expensive toys, the bunny feels naturally shy and insecure. The bunny longed to fit in with his peers. Actually, he hoped to become special to the boy. Abandoned after the excitement of Christmas, the rabbit befriends the wise old rocking horse. He explains to the rabbit that the boy will eventually love him and make him real. One day, Rabbit and Rocking Horse engaged in a conversation. “What is real?” Rabbit asked. “Does it mean having things buzz inside you and having a stick-out handle?” The rocking horse replied, “Real isn’t how you are made, it’s a thing that happens to you when a child loves you for a long, long time. Not just to play with, but to really love you. Then you will become real.” Rabbit, “Does it hurt?” Rocking Horse replied honestly,” Sometimes, for when you are real, you don’t mind being hurt.” Rabbit asked more of being real, “Does it happen all at once like when you are wound up, or bit by bit?” Rocking Horse, “It doesn’t happen all at once. You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or must be safely kept. Generally, by the time you are real, most of your hair has been loved off and your eyes drop out, and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all because once you are real, except to people who don’t understand.” Rabbit, “I suppose you are real.” Rocking Horse smiled. “The boy’s uncle made me real. Once you a real, you can’t become unreal again.” Rabbit wished aloud that he could become real without these unpleasant things happening to them, to which Rocking Horse Replied, “When you are real, shabbiness doesn’t matter.” As the story goes, the horse is right, The Velveteen Rabbit is selected to keep the boy safe and secure during a serious illness. A special bond develops between the boy and the rabbit. Along with the experiences the two share together, the rabbit transforms from a toy to something the rocking horse calls “real.” The rocking horse claims that real is what happens when you become your true self, not a contrived, shiny, pretend thing, and are loved despite, and maybe even because of, your imperfections. The Velveteen Rabbit is much more than a children’s tale, it is a classic metaphor. This story has the power to provoke our deepest desires, inspire reflection and remind us of the basic truths in life. From one vantage point, The Velveteen Rabbit appears as just a tale for children, a story that brings to mind beloved toys and childhood dreams. But if we shift our view just a bit, we can see that the words hold truth and meaning for children of all ages, young and young-at-heart. A further shift and the Velveteen Rabbit himself is able to explain the intricacies of our own life, our own truths. In The Velveteen Rabbit, the real wake-up call is called being real. Being real is truly being yourself and not a version of something you think you are supposed to be. In my coaching I call this, living my authentic life. This theory is based on our own individuality. Being real is different for everyone. Whether speaking about living an authentic life, living the coaching lifestyle or being real, one thing is the same. We are all striving for a feeling of happiness and contentment. We are always looking for work that is engaging, relationships that feel satisfying and genuine love so we never feel alone in this world. Just like the book, once you are real, you know that everything you say and do matters to others. It helps you understand sadness and happiness. You will want to help ease others’ sadness and bring happiness to your loved ones. It helps you strive to leave your mark on this earth. In the book, the Velveteen Principles, Toni Raiten-D’Antonio lists 12 principles. Real is Possible- Being real is a
Back on Track in 2021 – Part 5
Putting it all together. In this last month, our Back on Track Challenge had us focusing on our own mind, body and spirit, realizing we are the CEO of this life. We delved into the why, our purpose, what we want out of life. We added some movement, we respect our body. We practiced meditations to increase our mindfulness. Now, this last week we can work on bringing these ideas altogether. Creating a Level 10 life. What Is a Level 10 Life? What exactly does Level 10 Life mean? It means that all areas of your life are balanced and you are living your best possible life! The idea is from an amazing book, The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. It’s basically a way to help you assess your current life situation and then set goals for yourself. We all want to live a better life, but sometimes it’s hard to figure out exactly how to go about doing that. We might pick random goals that we think we “should” achieve, but are they goals that really matter to us? Will they really make us happier? That’s where a Level 10 Life assessment helps! You look at different aspects of your life and decide which you need to improve and which you are OK with. 10 Areas of the Level 10 Life The wheel of life assessment is a circle graph that is divided into 10 sections — one for each major area of focus in your life. Each section has a progress bar to fill in (from 1-10) with how satisfied you are with that area of your life.” A quick note here – it’s kind of impossible to have 10 on all the areas all the time, so when you start thinking of a few areas you want to build up a bit and start from there. Instead of doing 10 for all the areas try to make them all equally good. I really love this technique because I know I can end up putting too much time and effort into just one area and totally forget about others. When this happens, your other areas usually go down, and whether you know why or now you’ll end up not being that happy. So this is an amazing way to remind yourself to think wider, to think about your life as a whole, not just one area. This system tracks 10 areas of your life. Some you may not have ever thought about improving. Family & Friends Personal Development Spirituality Finances Career & Business Significant Other & Romance Fun & Recreation Contributing & Giving Health & Fitness Physical Environment Now, these are just the areas that are suggested by Elrod. But guess what? Your life is yours! So feel free to add, omit, combine, and be creative with your categories. If you want to be more specific (romance —–> marriage or physical environment ——-> home), make those changes. Reaching Your Level 10 Life Goals 1. Assess Your Life Before you start making goals, you should assess your life in the 10 areas that we just talked about. So first, grab a pen and some paper (or your favorite notebook) and settle in. This should take at least an hour. You want to be thoughtful in your assessment. If you’re not sure exactly where to start with your assessment, I’ve thought of a few questions that you can ask yourself. If you’d like even more journaling prompts that cover the majority of these categories, check out this post on self-discovery questions. These questions are about where you are RIGHT NOW. What are the areas in your life that you currently love? What about them makes you so happy? What areas of your life are not going well? What makes you feel that way about them? What areas of your life do you spend most of your time thinking about? By the way, these assessments are often done during life coaching sessions. If you’re interested in life coaching or specifically self-care coaching, check out my services. The basic idea is to give each of the areas above a score out of 10 and then see which areas are lacking and which are not. Yep, it really is that simple. Don’t overthink it; go with your gut instinct. For example, maybe you’ve been telling people for years about how you want to move to a bigger house. If that’s really what you want then your physical environment score wouldn’t be super high right now. But maybe when you go to score that area you instinctively give it a very high score, maybe an eight or nine. If that’s the case, then possibly that big house isn’t really what you want… 2. Record Your Current Life Levels There are lots of different wants to track your progress towards your Level 10 Life. Here are a few ideas of ways to record your Life Levels: Write your level rankings down in a notebook Use Trello, OneNote, or another digital notebook to record your levels Write them on a whiteboard or blackboard so you see them every day Record it in your Bullet Journal Use my Level 10 Life Printable at the end of this post. It doesn’t matter HOW you track your progress, just as long as you do it! 3. Ask Yourself Where You Want to Be Now that you have a firm grasp on where you are right now, ask yourself where you want to be. What does your level 10 life look like? Who do you spend your time with? What do you spend your time doing? How does it all make you feel? So you have an idea of what you’d like your life to look like and maybe even some steps to start getting there. 4. Set Your Goals Now that you can see where you may want to improve or what is out of balance you can start setting some goals! Make Them SMART (Specific, measurable, attainable, relevant,
Back on Track in 2021 – Part 4
Do you ever feel like you are at your limit? When you feel like you are stuck in a fight or flight mode for far too long. We’re always on edge waiting for the next storm to blow in. We have lots of ways of expressing this feeling, and most of us are familiar with it: “I’m about to lose my mind.” “I’m at my wit’s end.” “I don’t know what I’m doing.” “I can’t get focused on anything.” “I just can’t take it anymore.” Sometimes when we feel that way, we just “suck it up”, and “deal with it.” Other times, we feel so stretched thin that even a slight upset sends us spiraling so far down the emotional overload path. Then we start to feel hopeless and ask, “Is that all there is?” “Can I expect more from my life?” “Will, I ever feel happy?” No one is exempt from feelings of deep disappointment, regret, longing, guilt, anger, and fear. So, what are some strategies to quiet the mind, calm our worst fears, or help us see solutions to problems? Accessing mental health services. Sometimes our problems are bigger than overbooking appointments, and the kids spilling juice on the carpet. There are situations where we need an outside individual that we can dump our emotional overload on. There may be issues in your past that need to be dealt with. Some find relief in their practice of religion or seek help from the clergy. These efforts to find a balance between our stress and our hopes for happiness are valuable, and I recommend them based on my own experience. I have also found that we are able to increase the likelihood of success if we learn ways to help ourselves. There are many well-documented studies that support the practice of mindfulness or meditation, and I have experienced the benefits, along with many of my clients. In a 2012 study, researchers compared brain images from 50 adults who meditate and 50 adults who do not meditate. Results suggested that people who practiced meditation for many years had more folds in the outer layer of the brain. This process (called gyrification) may increase the brain’s ability to process information (Meditation: In Depth, 2016). The brain is an electrochemical organ – using electromagnetic energy to function. Electrical activity emanating from the brain is displayed in the form of brainwaves. There are five categories of these brainwaves. They range from high amplitude, low-frequency delta to low amplitude, high-frequency beta. Men, women, and children of all ages experience the same characteristic brainwaves. They are consistent across cultures and country boundaries. During meditation brain waves alter. GAMMA – greater than 30 cycles per second – Subjective feeling states: thinking; integrated thoughts. Associated tasks & behaviors: high-level information processing, “binding”. Physiological correlations: associated with information-rich task processing. Gamma is measured between 30 and 44 cycles per second and is the only frequency group found in every part of the brain. When the brain needs to simultaneously process information from different areas, it hypothesizes that the 40Hz activity consolidates the required areas for simultaneous processing. Good memory is associated with well-regulated and efficient 40Hz activity, whereas a 40Hz deficiency creates learning disabilities. BETA – 13-30 cycles per second – awakening awareness, extroversion, concentration, logical thinking – active conversation. A debater would be in high beta. A person making a speech, or a teacher, or a talk show host would all be in beta when they are engaged in their work. It is generally regarded as a normal rhythm and is the dominant rhythm in those who are alert or anxious or who have their eyes open. It is a state that most of the brain is in when we have our eyes open and are listening and thinking during analytical problem solving, judgment, decision making, processing information about the world around us. Beta would represent overdrive or hyperdrive in our car scenario. ALPHA – 7-13 cycles per second – relaxation time, non-arousal, meditation, hypnosis. Good healthy alpha production promotes mental resourcefulness, aids in the ability to mentally coordinate, and enhances the overall sense of relaxation and fatigue. In this state, you can move quickly and efficiently to accomplish whatever task is at hand. When Alpha predominates most people feel at ease and calm. Alpha appears to bridge consciousness to the subconscious. Alpha has been linked to extroversion (introverts show less), creativity (creative subjects show alpha when listening and coming to a solution for creative problems), and mental work. When your alpha is within normal ranges, we tend to also experience good moods, see the world truthfully and have a sense of calmness. Alpha is one of the brain’s most important frequency to learn and use the information taught in the classroom and on the job. You can increase alpha by closing your eyes or deep breathing or decrease alpha by thinking or calculating. Alpha-Theta training can create an increase in sensation, abstract thinking, and self-control. In our car scenario, Alpha would represent neutral or idle. Alpha allows us to shift easily from one task to another. THETA – 4-7 cycles per second – daydreaming, dreaming, creativity, meditation, paranormal phenomena, out-of-body experiences, ESP, shamanic journeys. A person who is driving on a freeway and discovers that they can’t recall the last five miles, is often in a theta state – induced by the process of freeway driving. This can also occur in the shower or tub or even while shaving or brushing your hair. It is a state where tasks become so automatic that you can mentally disengage from them. The ideation that can take place during the theta state is often free flow and occurs without censorship or guilt. It is typically a very positive mental state. DELTA – 1.5-4 or fewer cycles per second – deep dreamless sleep. We increase Delta waves to decrease our awareness of the physical world. We also access information in our unconscious mind through Delta. Peak performers decrease Delta
Back on Track in 2021 – Part 3
Now that you have integrated steps 1 and 2, it is time to consider step 3: Get Moving!! In step one, you are determined to take charge of your life as the CEO, the one in charge, the decider. Step two invites you to consider your purpose, what you live for, what gets you out of bed in the morning, your why. Even if this changes day by day, that is fine; but you need that sense of focus pretty much all the time to stay motivated, avoid distractions, and know the difference. Now, you need to incorporate your body into dedicated, purposeful movement. Numerous authorities support the idea of moving for mental health, as well as physical health. According to the research, subjects who reported regular exercise at the one-year follow-up had lower depression scores than did their less active counterparts. Exercise seems not only important for treating depression, but also in preventing relapse (Babyak et al., 2000, p. 634) When I say get moving, it is easy to slip into the standard notions of joining a gym, buying exercise equipment, or signing up for a 5k. Woah Woah too much, too fast, and too complicated. Unless your goal is to run a 5k or bench press your weight, getting moving can simply mean putting on some fun music and dance while cleaning, searching Youtube for some beginning yoga videos, and learning some new poses. In the Midwest, we have reached the pinnacle of winter and the seasonal blues. The days are still short, it is cold, the snow on the ground is less novel. Since I will not be taking a walk around the block, I must find ways to move around in my house. Little ways to increase movement every day: Calls on the move. I have gotten into the habit of taking my conference calls with my BlueTooth headset and phone strapped to my arm and walk to the house circuit. I walk from one room to the next, and around and around. Unless I am working on client assessments staying hands-free and wandering around the house seems to help my focus and creativity. 2. Take two trips. Have you ever carried every single grocery bag in from the store even though it meant cutting off the circulation in your fingers. I have. Take two trips. Use this as an opportunity to lessen your load and increase your movement. 3. Dance Dance Time to clean the floors. Put on your favorite club music and wiggle your butt around the house. (Actual cleaning may not happen.) 4. Beat yourself. According to the National Institutes of Health, “Continuous self-monitoring from wearable technology with real-time feedback may be particularly useful to enhance lifestyle changes that promote weight loss in sedentary overweight or obese adults. This strategy, combined with a group-based behavioral intervention, may yield optimal weight loss.” You may have heard the Peter Drucker quote, “What gets measured gets managed,” or “What gets managed gets done.” Having a Fitbit or other wearable technology that measures your calories burned, steps are taken, or any other measure of your activity influences your subconscious and conscious mind to move more. Movement can be freeing! You can do it in a group, or alone. The point is DO IT! and commit to a regular experience. If you are feeling down, unproductive, dealing with a lot of worry or anxiety, get up and go! Being physically active, and solutions you could not have accessed before, will show up, and you’ll feel energized to tackle the usual stuff that gets in your way. Happy Moving in 2021! Manifest in the Midwest References Babyak, M., Blumenthal, J. A., Herman, S., Khatri, P., Doraiswamy, M., Moore, K., Edward Craighead, W., Baldewicz, T. T., & Ranga Krishnan, K. (2000). Exercise Treatment for Major Depression: Maintenance of Therapeutic Benefit at 10 Months. Psychosomatic Medicine, 62(5), 633–638. https://doi.org/10.1097/00006842-200009000-00006
Back on Track in 2021 – Part 2
Once you have practiced the concept of being the CEO of your life (Back on Track in 2021 Part 1), let us start by focusing on your PURPOSE! This becomes the reason that you get up in the morning, even if it is just for today. Though you can always change your purpose, there is a lot of strength-building from determining a longer-range intention–maybe one that takes you a few months into the year. This means it is time to get busy and learn about yourself. I have included some questions to help you explore yourself. These exercises help clarify what underlying principles drive your purpose and give power to your plans. It is time to write an answer to this key question: Why Am I Here? Make a clear statement that is concise enough to display around you as a bumper sticker, poster, sticky-note, etc. This is your motto, your mission, the soundtrack to your life. Saying this motto can become a mantra, a magnet for energy and inspiration. You will be amazed at the change in you as you establish certainty and power. You will find yourself exploring your mission, the action steps to implement it, and the empowerment to carry it out. New energy and optimism will come to you, as you accomplish even the smallest step toward realizing your purpose. Doors of opportunity will open when you announce to yourself what you are doing. Soon others will notice and begin to take note of the certainty and confidence you are revealing. Try imagining your purposeful self-taking charge! You are a diamond, a powerful, attractive, capable person just longing to shine your light on the world. Questions to help you explore yourself. There is a strong relationship between a person’s sense of purpose or meaning in life, their ability to overcome, and their overall happiness. The following is a list of questions that can assist you in discovering who you are and your unique purpose. Instructions: Take out a few sheets of paper or your journal and a pen. Find a quiet, peaceful, place where you will not be disturbed. Choose a question below, think about it, and then write down what comes to mind without analyzing, editing, or judging. Pick another question and do the same. Perhaps most importantly, enjoy the moment and enjoy the process of self-discovery! Questions: What would you like to change about the world for the better? (what issues in society or on the news make you most angry, what causes do you strongly believe in or connect with?) What would you do if you could not fail? What would you do if you were not limited by money? What would you like to hear at your funeral? (what would each speaker say about you and your life; what kind of friend, family member, colleague were you; what character would you like them to have seen in you; what contributions and achievements would you want them to remember; what difference did you make in their lives; what is your legacy?) What accomplishments are you most proud of, small or big? Who inspires you the most? (anyone alive or deceased; current or historical figure; anyone you know or do not know; family, friends, authors, artists, leaders, etc.) What qualities do they have that inspire you? With whom would you like to surround yourself (what are the kind of people you would like to be surrounded with in terms of lifestyle, occupation, wealth, interests?) What gives you the most pleasure? What makes you smile? (activities, people, events, hobbies, projects, etc.) What makes you feel great about yourself? What are you good at? What qualities do you have that you are proud of? What do people typically ask you for help with? What were some challenges, difficulties, or hardships you’ve overcome? How did you do it? If you could get a message across to a large group of people, who would those people be? What would your message be? What do you want to accomplish before you die? Recall the happiest moments in your life. What were you doing? What were the circumstances? What is the underlying theme, if any? What would your perfect day look like? What are some common themes or things you notice in your responses? What are the things you discovered about yourself? Given your responses, what might you consider changing to create a better life for yourself? Adapted from: http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/life-on-purpose-15-questions-to-discover-your-personal-mission/ My way, my purpose, my inner soundtrack is simple. To compassionately and intuitively work with people, live a creative life, love wisely and inspire others to seek the light in dark circumstances. “If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” – Booker T. Washington So why are you here? Manifest in the Midwest
